Where's the Eggnog?

 

by Justin Ebriated

 

 

When I saw the new forum called 'Holiday Cheer'

I quickly, with jitters, hightailed over here!

And then I came in with my head in a fog

And I searched and I searched for the high-test eggnog!

 

Where is the Eggnog? I can't seem to find it!

I'm ready for cheer and I sure wouldn't mind it!

During the holidays, nog is quite liked.

I assume someone's dutifully getting it spiked?

 

Pray tell, where's the eggnog, my poetry pals?

Has it all been drank up by you fine guys and gals?

Did I miss it or is the bartender en route?

Should I sit and wait for it or leave in a pout?

 

I assumed in a forum called 'Holiday Cheer',

there'd certainly be some spiked eggnog in here!

Justin Thyme please start serving, before I pass out!

'Cause what else could this 'Holiday Cheer' be about?

 

I'll check when Nurse Cratchet's escaped on her break,

while she's out of the 'Stute and my hands start to shake.

I'll be back to make toasts with my poetry friends.

So, I hope that the bartender starts to bartend!

 

With Thanksgiving over, soon Santa will come

And I'm SURE he'll bring eggnog all spiked up with rum!

 

signed,

 

Justin Ebriated

 

 

Justine Uff

 

How did you ever 'scape the 'Stute?

I left you there passed out.

I've hidden all the booze from you

You'll not find it about!!

 

We'll have our eggnog sans the rum

You'll like it just as well

A sober holiday's in store for you

Now won't that just be swell?

 

You'll thank me dear, I know you will

with Christmas season near

To face the world with eyes anew

You're Santa's sober help this year!!

 

 

Justin Ebriated

 

It's Aunt Justine! I can't believe it!

She won't leave me alone!

I get a drink and she retrieves it!

She doesn't like me stoned!

 

I think her problem, it's a big one,

is that she's uptight.

She doesn't like when ANYBODY

has fun through the night.

 

Hey, Aunt Justine! Just mind your business

and let me have some fun!

Or else when Santa comes to visit,

he just won't give you none!

 

You've always been a troublemaker!

You make trouble every year!

Every Thyme you say don't drink

I get another beer!

 

So please just go on to the mall

and buy some Christmas stuff.

Because your griping's like your name

and I've had Justine Uff!

 

JE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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